Find arms that will hold you at your weakest.

Today was a day that I was excited for, but also dreaded at the same time.

Today was the day that Keith and I started our first round of testing

to see if we could figure out why this whole baby making thing 

isn't working out too swell for us.

Before heading to the hospital,

I told Keith that I wasn't sure what I wanted my goal

to be for today (I know--such a teacher, right?!).

I felt like I wanted the doctors to find something so that we could 

fix it, solve the problem, and be holding a bundle of joy in no time.

But at the same time, you never want to hear that something is wrong with you...you know?!

Keith was up first today and we will find out his results

in 5 days 

(P.S.--This will be the longest 5 days EVER!).

Next up was yours truly.

The ultrasound was first and showed no problems.

I still couldn't decide if I was happy or sad about this.

Then, came the HSG test.

Ever since I found out I was having this test performed,

I youtubed and googled the heck out of this test.

I wanted to know exactly what to expect from

this oh-so-uncomfortable test.

Everything I read was right!

You know the saying,

"Quick and painless" ?

It's a pretty quick test, but definitely

not painless.

I hope to not have this test again

anytime soon.

Results from this test: everything normal.

Again, happy or sad about this?

After talking with Keith,

we have decided that we are happy with 

our results today.

It's nice to know that

"structurally" 

nothing is wrong so hopefully

whatever is causing our roadblock can be fixed

with a few drugs 

(Clomid anyone?!).

After we got home, I gave Keith a quick

kiss and thanked him for being with me today.

As if I didn't know he was a keeper already,

he then said this,

"Of course. Today was important."

For some reason these quick two

sentences made me all warm and fuzzy inside.

So many times I have felt alone in this journey.

Not for Keith's lack of trying to understand,

it's just different for men and women.

Keith inspired today's quote:

I am truly grateful for my husband.

There have been many days that I thought

he would pack up and leave because my crazy

train was in town.  

He has seen me at my weakest, ugliest, and worst

yet loves me anyway.

We will get through this together.

It just takes time.

Love,

T